Have you ever read a book that spoke to you? I mean, really spoke to you? I have just finished reading Kelly Martin’s ‘When Everyone Shines But You’ and I’m convinced Kelly was addressing me in every page! This book ‘allows’ you to be yourself, not what you’ve been conditioned to think you should be, just simply to be yourself. It challenges our inbuilt and cultural referencing which suggest we should be striving and achieving ‘the next thing.’
Kelly explores what it is that makes us think X Y or even Z will make us happy. I needed to read this book. I needed to read this book at this stage of my life. At this time. Things happening when they are meant to happen is a strong theme in this book and i completely believe this to be true. I believe in qadr (destiny) so this idea that things that we think happen by chance in fact happen because that’s how they were planned. Whether we know the reasons or not, things will happen when they were destined to happen.
This book is also about acceptance. Acceptance of yourself (first and foremost) but also of other people. It’s about knowing that you have no control over how people act or respond to situations but that that the way you view yourself and how you percive other people is completely in your control. Changing your ideas of why people do certain things allow you to realise that people are flawed. We are all flawed and that is absolutely fine, it is just how we are meant to be. We should accept our flaws and celebrate them, not strive to be like fake versions of ourselves. The version that society dictates we should be.
The Buddhist philosophy regarding the transient nature of life and emotions seemed to be echoed in the book to me. Being mindful and completely in the moment is what we should be aiming for as all we have is now. Only this moment. We get caught up in anxiety and worry about the future and what everyone else is doing rather than focusing on ourselves, our lives and our self esteem. This is an amazing book that i will certainly revisit. It is personal and really well written, i found myself reading sections and pondering over Kelly’s words for days. The section regarding money really struck a chord with me. Kelly states “if money is meant to be in your life, it will be. If you dont have it, it’s not meant to be in your life.” This makes a lot of sense and gave me a reminder just when i needed it. My life is they way it is supposed to be. It always has been and it always will be.
This book is a must read for all people who have ever struggled with self confidence or feelings of hopelessness or self doubt, this book will change your life!